Tuesday, July 02, 2002

Right. I'm off on vacation, folks. I'm heading into the mouth of danger, and may be forced to turn around as soon as I arrive, but I'm taking the risk to see some family that I haven't had the chance to visit with for far too long. If you don't hear back from me by this time next Tuesday, it's safe to assume I've either been reduced to charcoal, killed in a plane crash, abducted by aliens, or given up blogging. I'll leave you with this closing thought:

Everything I need to know, I learned in kindergarden. Well, everything that is except how to read and write, the basics of math, history, and geography, general rules of politeness and manners, tying my own shoes, the beauty of literature, typing, check writing, the importance of hygiene, how to get the condom on the quickest without spoiling the mood, and the proper use of chopsticks. Other than that, it’s safe to say I could have dropped out before the first grade, and done quite nicely for myself.

So Happy 4th of July, my fellow Americans. Please take care not to blow your face and hands off while playing with fireworks. To our great pals in the U.K., whad'ya say, no hard feelings, huh?

Okay, Hugo, look...first of all, loaded phrases like "the Bush regime" will get you nowhere. Second, to say something like "In a Congress many of whose members take the wisdom of Senator Jesse Helms..." just shows how ignorant you truly are. Fuck off, old man.

Given that I'm hours away from getting on a plane, this is so comforting.

Monday, July 01, 2002

One of my neighbors recently bought a rooster.

I'm seriously beginning to re-think my objections to animal cruelty.

David Trimble thinks the Ulster BBC is biased.

Said a senior Ulster Unionist source: "When David was signing the Agreement on Good Friday, smiling with Gerry Adams and forming a government, he was hailed as the most progressive unionist politician ever by the BBC in Belfast, but when he began to point out Sinn Fein/IRA's involvement in terrorism, he ceased to be a 'good guy'.

"He's wondering what the agenda is. He's also concerned that respected commentators from the unionist community are being excluded from current affairs programmes, produced in Belfast."

I've never watched it, so I can't comment on Mr. Trimble's accusations in any way. But if other bits of the media are anything to go by, I wouldn't be surprised if his claims were true. In terms of the media, especially the American media, you're either Gerry Adams, or you're Johnny Adair, and there's nothing in between, as far as they're concerned. For those of you who may not be farmiliar (lucky bastards) with Ol' Mad Dog, he's a loyalist paramilatary considered to be the leader of the UFF, and whose expressive and eloquent command of the English language has resulted in statements on his part like "You can shove those doves of peace right in your arse".

He (Trimble) said: "I have difficulties with the BBC in Belfast and that is evident. I have no difficulties with broadcasters from other BBC regions."

He has obviously never seen the international version of the broadcast.